Creating Magical Content - Finding Consistent Energy & Authentic Expression in the Online Space

Paula Shepherd Author

Are your childhood stories around what it means to be a writer still holding you back from sharing authentic stories that connect?

Do you put a lot of pressure on yourself to write? Are your childhood stories around what it means to be a writer still holding you back from sharing authentic stories that connect? In today’s episode Megan Barnard shares her inspiring story of becoming an intuitive writing coach. She shares the connection between writing and ancient magic. Megan shares how the online agenda may be clouding your opportunity to share your story and how to reframe how you think about consistency in order to write more and create deeper connections!

In this episode we chat about:

How your words, spoken and written, are pure magic.

Megan finds the same mindset blocks in her clients as she did in her 4th grade students.

Writing as play and allowing yourself to be bad.

The balance between professionalism and over sharing.

Coffee/connection chats

Being a female with a cycle

And so much more!

Megan Barnhard is an intuitive writing coach and Story Magician. She helps transformational coaches write conscious business content or the book that's in their soul.

Her superpowers are being an empathic channel, connecting the dots so her clients see their own magic, and helping people uncover their writing flow.

Megan's on a mission to help women unleash their authentic voice and change the world with their words. She believes words are energy, and energy is what moves us all.

Connect with Megan!

https://www.meganbarnhard.com/

https://www.facebook.com/groups/writeinflow

https://www.instagram.com/writewithmegan/

Timestamps:

(03:08) Megan shares how your words, spoken and written, are pure magic.

(05:16) Megan’s journey from remedial reading and writing teacher to intuitive writing coach for female online business owners. She found the same mindset blocks in her clients as she did in the educational settings.

(16:18) Allowing yourself to create and write and be bad before you learn the skill of writing. Permission to play in your writing.

(18:45) Finding your authentic voice and expression between professionalism and over sharing.

(25:25) The speed that ideas travel in the online space and the definition of success, and “magnetic” content.

(29:33) When coffee chats/connection calls are a good thing!

(32:15) Following your intuition when navigating writing and social media.

(33:30) Creating consistent energy not “consistency”.

(35:00) Not expecting to feel the same all the time and taking the pressure off yourself to write every day.

Transcript:

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

people, writing, feel, energy, words, online, write, person, coach, consistency, share, authentic, big, megan, severe learning disabilities, business, work, idea, business owner, put

SPEAKERS

Megan Barnhard, Paula Shepherd

Paula Shepherd 00:01

Hi, I'm Paula shepherd. I went to college to get a good job and make a lot of money. Back then, no one talked about doing what you love. And while I successfully climbed the corporate ladder, I felt like there was something missing. So I left the seemingly comfortable corporate world at 40 years old for the freedom of full time entrepreneurship. Today, I get to help ambitious women go from entrepreneur to confident CEO of their lives and businesses. I created this podcast to share what I've learned with you to make your journey just a little easier, and to connect you with other incredible business owners who took a chance on themselves and who they are becoming. So whether you're just getting started, are all in for just want to hear a friendly voice. Come on in and sit with us. Now, let's dive in. Hey, everyone, welcome to another episode of the competence Sessions. Today, I have with me Megan Barnhart. She is an intuitive writing coach and a story magician and I can attest to that fact. She definitely is a story magician. She helps transformational coaches write conscious business content, or the book that's in their soul. She has several superpowers like being an empathic channel, connecting the dots so that her clients see their own magic and helping people uncover their writing flow. She is on a mission to help women unleash their authentic voice and to change the world with their words. Whoo, I just got chills. So this is gonna be good. She believes words are energy and energy is what moves us all. Megan, welcome to the podcast.

Megan Barnhard 01:55

Thank you so much for having me, Paula. I'm just thrilled to be here.

Paula Shepherd 02:00

The moment I met you, I was so connected to you. And I think it was before you started talking a lot about channelling. And even before that, I knew there was something very special about you. Because the way that you approach writing, the way that you approach words and copy is unlike anyone else I've ever seen or experienced before. I've hired copywriters before. I've worked with them and other programmes, and I just wanted to put you in my pocket carry you around. Because you There was never a time where I felt like, or even now when I see what you put out there into the world that there is this rigid template, there's none of that for you. It is this inspiring, beautiful, like you talk about the energy coming from your soul, going out into the universe, and being able to not just say the words that you want to say, but to say them in a way that actually evokes the feelings and the energy that you meant behind them.

Megan Barnhard 03:06

Yeah, I just want to Can I start by reminding everybody that we are doing magic all of the time by speaking and writing. I mean, think about this, you have this ineffable, feeling sense, you know, inspiration that is coming, like from your deepest place. And then you have this technology where you can make sounds or put symbols on paper. And then other people get that really big, powerful insight that I mean, that's, it's freaking magic, right? And magic. And we live in a world of a lot of words. And I think it's really easy for us to forget the magic. But literally for centuries, you know, for millennia, people have known this way, it's not a coincidence that a magic spell is the same word as I'm spelling. And the root for grammar is the same as the root for Grimoire. Like a book of magic. So this is like a thing we knew. And we forgotten that our words are a kind of transformational magic, where we're bringing things from whatever you think of it as like another realm, another plane from God, from source from love, even just from your subconscious mind, however you frame that. We're bringing things forward. And the words are the container. So somebody else can go, oh, yeah, I get it. But really what they're getting is the energy behind it. And that's why I'm really lit up by the work that I do because I get to help people. Remember the purpose, the point and also the origin of their words. So they're less focused on is that the right word? Does that comma go there and more focused on what's this deep message from I sold that I want to be able to share with other people in a way they can easily get an understand.

Paula Shepherd 05:07

And that really started it. I believe back when you were teaching language remediation to kids with severe learning disabilities.

Megan Barnhard 05:15

Oh my gosh, yeah. So I was fascinated with learning. And right out of college, I did this specialised training. And I was working in a school for students with severe severe learning disabilities. And I have to tell you, I was so angry, because I went, there's a way to learn this and teach this I was never taught phonics as a kid, I just just like, you know, it's all random. And I learned all of this, you know, deeper stuff about language by teaching it. And the the thrill of watching somebody who thought language was off limits to her, be able to use it. It's unequalled. And, you know, this, this, like watching a kid who thinks I'll never write and has internalised that, and if you think about how big a part of our lives reading and writing are, and if you were cut off from that, how isolated you would feel, and how demoralised so helping little ones, get that back, you know, when they're seven, or eight, or you know, even some of the kids I was working with were in high school, but that I was like, Okay, this is powerful, powerful work. But it's also really, really intense work. And as somebody who is very sensitive, very empathic, it was like, it was a very hard setting to be in. And so I ended up moving from working in a special education school to working in mainstream classroom. And still at the core of me, I was like, I want to teach writing. And that's, that's hard to do. In a classroom. There's a lot that you're responsible for, including being a crowd Wrangler, and a police officer, which I sucked at. Like, this is not my jam. And I knew I wanted to teach writing. And one of the parents of one of the kids in my fourth grade class, said, at the end of the year, Megan, my daughter has never done more writing or enjoyed writing more than she did this year. What are you doing for the summer, I was like, I'm teaching your daughter writing. And that was me stepping out into I had no idea what you know, this was 2006. I'd never heard of a coach, like a life coach, before I started calling myself a writing coach, the way you would be a baseball coach, right? Where your job is to help somebody play baseball, the best they can with their abilities, and to look at what they're doing and help them make tweaks and improve. And by passion was really like, How can I give this tool to every buddy I encountered every child I work with? That they get to express themselves? And you know, like kids who hated writing, and then I would give them the green light and say, Please, I want to read your essay about Pokemon. Like tell me everything about chars are like you roll with it, right? And this light would go on. So it went from like, kids who were struggling just to have, you know, language output at all, to kids who were like, well, I have this all this cool stuff internally. But I've gotten the message that that's not what writing is, you know, writing is a persuasive essay about blah, blah, blah topic that the teacher picked. And I was like, Yo, writing is you expressing yourself. And so that was really joyful. And for for six years, I had like a thriving in person practice helping kids. And at the same time, also, I was like, I'm still feeding into the school system, and I am such a rebel. I really have so many disagreements with the way we do education. And I was like, it's it's not, it's not happening. And concurrent with that feeling of like, what's next? And what am I doing because I was fully booked out, and I was working six days a week and I there was just no room to grow.

Megan Barnhard 09:06

We had the opportunity, my husband and I had the opportunity to move for his work. And what happened with that was I started putting, putting my business online. And as I started learning about running a business online, I started meeting all these online business owners, and oh my god, the biggest lightning bolt struck me because I was in this place of well, who writes except students. It turns out everybody wants a business online. Yes. And and what I saw was fascinating because I could with X ray vision, not that I could name all of the things that had happened in their life. But I had this X ray vision and I could see through the business owner now like the adult business owner, to the scared child who'd been at school and didn't want to ask questions, or the person who was told that's not a good topic to write about. or the person who was told you have poor penmanship and internalise that as I shouldn't be a writer. And I started working with business owner clients and their stories were exactly parallel to, you know, maybe different in degree but exactly parallel to these students I've been working with, where they felt like it wasn't okay for their real voice to come out. And then to put themselves in a box. Plus, they were bringing whatever, confusion or misalignment about their writing process with them. Like, most people don't get an opportunity to explore what is their writing process, you know, maybe they learned in school, you brainstorm, and then you outline and then you jump, okay, but there are a gajillion different ways to do each part of that process. So has anybody ever sat with you and said, like, let's play an experiment? What's the brainstorming modality that brings out your ideas in the easiest, most fun way? Right? Like, how do you draft that takes you less time and feels really good? How do you revise so you feel more confident, instead of like, Oh, God, I just can't do this. And you know, everything's wrong. And, you know, I started working with adults through those pieces, and it was this revelation. So now I, what I really feel like I did was to move my work. Oh, now I'm going to like, mess it up, is it upstream or downstream? One of those two, but it was like, first I was helping people in crisis. And that was really healing for, you know, my own inner child. But then as I started moving up, it was like, I have an opportunity to help the people who are the change makers in the world, right. And so if I help them, own their voice, be more authentic and also share their message, because these were transformational coaches, right. So the more they're getting their message out, the more they're able to serve people do that transformational work, whether they're business coaches, or health coaches, or they work with spirit, or they work with relationships, you know, they're helping people create transformation. And the ripple effect is like, do you know, exponentially bigger, so instead of, you know, it's that thing of like, when you see the kids being pushed, or you keep pulling the kids out of the river, in a certain point, you're like, let me go upstream and see why they're falling in. That's what it felt like, where I could bring these gifts of everybody I feel like writing is everybody's birthright. That doesn't mean everybody has to write. And for some people, that's not how they express themselves and great. I don't express myself by painting, you know, I don't express myself by making sculpture. But everybody has a birthright to write if they want to. And now working with business owners, I got to bring that same fire of, I want you to know how you can share your voice and like for it to feel good to people who are at this, you know, they're positioned in a way to make a really massive impact. So you're exactly right. It is that same impulse. And I love that I got a I got to bring it to an arena. That's really, I mean, I think, I think online women business owners are a massive force in the world where we're changing the economy. Think about this is a this is a sector of the economy that does not mind resources. It does not manufacture and create all of that pollution. It you know what I mean? Like, yes, oh, my gosh, yeah, use energy in our computers and stuff. But if you think about, like, how could we, as a human society continue growing, without like running through our resources and creating more pollution and like, online transformational coaching is pretty much awesome.

Paula Shepherd 13:50

It really is. I didn't know anything about any of this, you know, a year and a half ago when I first started my business and I will say I was in that category of one not quite understanding how transformational the work that I was going to do was because for a really long time, I was the person that had just way too many ideas. I thought too big I was you know, pie in the sky ideas, how was I going to take all of that multi passion and put it into something and then also having so much to say, not really knowing how do I how do I say that? And not wanting it to be dear diary on social media. I feel like there's a balance and there are

Megan Barnhard 14:33

I burped, it tasted like hot dogs. Yeah,

Paula Shepherd 14:37

exactly. Or like processing there's this idea of like, I didn't didn't want to take any of my past hurts. That potentially had not been the in traumas, you know. And when I say trauma, I don't mean like big traumas. But even when we all go through traumatic events, or even if it's like, you know, so and so said, My nose was big when I was in middle school and I never forgot it. That is a true story. But those kinds of things that you that, you know, you have to make sure that you've really processed them. And the idea as a business owner, that we have to be professional, I'm air quoting, and you can't see me do that. Oh, I can hear it. Yes, yes. Professional? Yeah. And that, so how so when you're working with someone, let's just say in the very beginning of working with someone, or someone that's just starting to explore how do I, how do I get into the digital space in my business, and share what I have to say, without losing the ability to be a, quote, professional business owner?

Megan Barnhard 15:49

Well, let me make sure I'm understanding how do they how do they speak authentically without losing the professionalism? Or how do they get exactly? They have to be professional? Yeah, okay.

Paula Shepherd 16:00

How do they write that? How do they? How do they? Well, I guess fart part of it would be how do they get over that? How do you help someone get past that in their writing, when they're first putting their stuff out online, and really, truly being authentic with their storytelling?

Megan Barnhard 16:16

Like, first, you have to allow for it to be bad? Do you know the expression the first pancake is for the cat? Huh?

Paula Shepherd 16:23

Oh, no, I've never heard that. But I like it now. Right? So

Megan Barnhard 16:25

you know, you'd like you heat up the pan, you know, it's going to get to that right temperature. But that first pancake you put on, it's just like, it's it's burned, or it's you know, it doesn't get enough colour at all right? You have to let it be bad. And there's a lot that's wrong with social media. But one thing that I love about it is that the shelf life of anything you put out there is, you know, days, sometimes hours, I mean, things are there, and then they're gone. So I like to think of it as a sandbox. And I encourage clients to play there to explore to let it be bad, because you can't in writing and in lots of other things, you can't do it in your head, you can't like visualise it until it's good. And then the first iteration you put out into the world is good, you know, you have to do it badly. And then you get better at it. And it's absolutely a skill, anybody can learn it. And when I'm taking people through writing, I'm giving them an opportunity to play an experiment. And I would say that's first and foremost, just take away the pressure, let it be bad. Don't reinvent the wheel. So I never ever want to lock somebody into a rigid structure at the same time. There are things that work. So imagine if you were coming at cooking, and you're like, I want to cook a delicious French cuisine. Well, you could just, you know, on your own in a vacuum in the kitchen, go, I wonder what that would look like and try combining things. Or you could go get Julia Child's cookbook, and you could read it and you could see like, what are the principles? And what are the, the concepts at play? Right? So teaching, I

Paula Shepherd 18:07

think I just order takeout. Yes.

Megan Barnhard 18:12

That works too. But you you wouldn't start from I have to sit alone in a room and create everything that works myself. So first thing is playing experimentation. Second thing is the principles. And hey, here's what works and how could you make it your own? And you know, going back to that example of the student who wrote me a Pokemon essay, you know, he was doing that in the framework of like, Oh, if you give an example, then, you know, explain why that's relevant. And how does that tie back to your thesis statement. So you can embrace principles without being stuck in a rigid structure. here's the here's the key thing, though. This because it's a kind of a pendulum. And it's we go to these two extremes. And on the one extreme is people who feel so boxed in like, I've got to be professional and I have to, everything has to be perfect. And on the other end are people who want to, like vividly describe to you, like, every horrific moment they've had in their lives. And it's, you know, it's more like Jerry Springer. It's not right, but those are these two ends, right? One is like, I have to be professional in the other ones, like, I'm just gonna air all my dirty laundry. Both of those are actually people being blocked from what is authentically in their heart, because a big part of authentic expression is honesty. And we all know the difference when we're honest. We all know the difference between oh my gosh, I want to talk this through with you because I would love your help and your reflection and your wise advice versus I'm just going to go on a rant and I want to vent You and I want to tell you about the person at the grocery store and what they did that was wrong. And like, What a horrible human they are. Right? Are you with me?

Paula Shepherd 20:07

Oh my gosh, yeah. Okay, nodding my head over here. Okay, so we

Megan Barnhard 20:11

all know what it feels like to show up and be honest and authentic. And it immediately will cut through both of those extremes, the being like, I have to be professional, or I'm just gonna, like, I'm gonna describe my snot to you. Because it's, it's real, you know, um, and we don't get a lot of opportunity to practice that. Being in that space, I think people who have been coached and who are coaches get way more practice. So they already have an advantage, I always say coaches have a huge advantage when it comes to creating authentic conscious content, because they already spend time in that space of honesty of like, Oh, what, what's my intention here, am I showing up to be seen or to see others? Or am I showing up to perform or to, you know, be angry, and rant. And then when I'm in session with people, like, I get to invite their honesty and their authenticity, by being vulnerable and authentic myself. And that I just really lucky that that comes easy to me, like, I will be just meeting you. And you know, in 10 minutes, I'll probably be crying in front of you. Because I'll be sharing deeply. Like, this just happened to me at a wonderful opportunity to get to meet in person, some people I'd only met in line. And we were the setting was not like we were deep diving coaching, we were eating tacos at a dive bar. And I was talking to the amazing woman next to me, and we were just chatting, and I just started tearing up because she was creating a space for me to be vulnerable. And I felt like, Hey, this is what's real for me, and I want to share because that will help me grow. But it was, you know, like in the midst of margaritas and loud music and people playing pool.

Paula Shepherd 22:10

You're my kind of person though, because I'm the same way, you know, being highly sensitive and being empathic and, and being able to explore not only to hold the space, but also to be able to, to share that in a way that right my intention behind it, or a client's intention behind it isn't, I'm going to say this. And I'm going to share this detail because I want people to like it and comment and respond and stroke my ego versus I want to say this because I know that when I do, it's going to help someone else do X, Y and Z. And hopefully have them avoid stepping in the pothole that I did. Or it will inspire someone to take this action or it will get someone's attention in a way that allows them to feel like they have permission to be themselves. Versus I want that like I want that comment. This is why I'm doing it. And I do recognise when you're online, we were talking about this before we started recording. And I think this is a great segue to the conversation of online versus in person energy. Because I have recently also started going to some in person events. And I noticed that the advantage that primarily online business owners have over others that aren't maybe as active in that space, or who just tossed something over the fence without trying to having you know, someone else do their marketing and their copywriting without them ever exploring how to do it themselves. It is like night and day, because you do have some very emotionally intelligent people online in a way that they can express the things that you're mentioning, right, like they can share, what you said is your soul's purpose and your life's work in a really meaningful way on a global level. Whereas in my own backyard when I am sitting with someone, and this isn't just for me, when you as a collective are sitting with someone in a space in a networking event, it suddenly feels like oh, wow, other people don't know this or other people don't share the way that I do. And there's a little bit of resistance there. So, you know, the energy between connecting in person and connecting online. This idea of magnetic content I find a lot of people are and it can be It's my pet peeve when people decide. They just want to write magnetic content, but they want to avoid conversations with people for instance, connection calls or coffee chats and really suck the peopling out of business. That's where I have a heart Because I really genuinely love and appreciate communication at all levels, and not just from a written format. And I also feel it in a lot of ways that people have become keyboard warriors by sitting behind a screen. But if I were to take them and pick them up and drop them into an in person environment, would they be as bold? As daring as they are online?

Megan Barnhard 25:24

Yeah, or as, as me centric? Right? I was, I was one, I was comparing it to road rage, right? Like how people in their cars will do things they would never do walking down the street. Right. But But I think it's, um, I think it's actually more about shielding. And there's so much in, like, think just think of how quickly new memes emerge. And I don't mean a meme as in the way we've come to think of it on social media, but like the definition of a meme, before we had, you know, pictures of, you know, people from TV shows with dialogue, or whatever it is, like a picture, it's just the idea of a social idea that spreads quickly. Right? So the, the speed at which that changes because of social media is lightning fast. And I think we all pick up on Oh, this is the thing I need to be doing very subconsciously very quickly. And without the judiciousness you know, without the discernment of going is this really, for me, and one of the huge memes, I think, is very present, and very easy to get sucked into is, what it means to be a successful online business owner is that you are a level above other people, right? And then, and then content gets used as the weapon to create that and people are sharing things like, Look how amazing my life is. And don't you want to be like me, because they've absorbed this idea, even if they're not consciously aware of it, that that's what success is. And that makes perfect sense then why they would go? I don't do you know, like coffee chats are beneath me, I used to do a lot of coffee chats. And I'll tell you exactly why I stopped, because I ended up giving away all of my energy. Right? So it was just like, when I'm with people, I'm really with them. So it was like, Whoa, that takes a lot of energy for me. And it's like, oh, my gosh, I'd have less energy to give to other things. And then also I would it just it's so hard for me not to just say to people, oh my gosh, that thing you said, here's how it could be a great story, here's how you could develop it, which is obnoxious to other people, if they don't want it, right, it's like getting, you don't want to get coach coached. But also, it was really eroding my internal. It's not like, Oh, they're now they're not gonna hire me because they weren't gonna hire me in the first place. If we were just chatting, you know, it's like they weren't at that point. But I was eroding my own sense of my value in the work that I do. And it made it very hard to value it in it because I was like, oh, that's just a thing I do with people when I have coffee. So I had some personal reasons for, you know, stopping having coffee, or virtual coffee with everybody I came

Paula Shepherd 28:32

across. And I have to put some boundaries in there. Yeah, I

Megan Barnhard 28:36

think it's a really good thing for people to check in with. And now I've started again, and it's feeling really good because I can come at it with this awareness of like, how much energy do I have, and also being present with people and not just getting excited and go, you should write about this. But don't you think it makes sense? Even if it's not a good thing? Don't you think it makes sense that people focus on as you call it, the magnetic content, by the way, I use that term? Like I I love the idea of being magnetic, but I think it comes from your energy. But it makes sense that people focus on that, that panacea, that pill that's gonna solve everything, that silver bullet as the content, because the messaging they're really getting is if you connect with people, then you're on their level, and will only see you as successful if you're like up at that next level and people are chasing you. Does that make? Absolutely

Paula Shepherd 29:32

it definitely does. And so when I just like a sidebar, from there a thread to pull. When I talk about magnetic content, it is that same kind of thing. I do believe that we connect with people through our words in a variety of different ways, right for me, it might be more video than it is my writing. I do a lot of audio into something you know, so that I can do audio notes and then I can transcribe them because that's Just how I operate. That's your process. Yeah, that is, that's your process. I'm a total verbal processor. And typing just feels really hard to me sometimes, but I can talk all day long. However, it's when people use, like you said, content as the magnetic bullet or the the silver bullet. And they don't try any of the other things. They don't know what their process is yet. And those people who are just learning how to discover or rediscover their authentic voice, and figure out what the hell that means in the first place, who are going well, this really successful person over here says, Don't do, I call them connection calls. But don't do coffee chats don't do this. But in order for you to learn and grow, like you said, you didn't do that you did them for a while you realise what wasn't working, you realise the energy behind it was like, I'm going to talk to everybody I possibly can. And then you burned yourself out. And now you're going back to them in a way where you're, you're doing it with within, you know, your own personal standards, and boundaries and limitations. And stepping into that with a whole different process, which is how I feel writing is, which leads me to consistency, the idea of consistency. So when you're writing in the way that that you coach people around, which is to do it from your soul to try to test. And yet there's this other voice in the echo chamber of social media that says consistency, consistency, consistency, and they're going, but I don't know what that means. I don't know what consistent means. I don't want to post every day, but I'm not feeling this, like flow of my words every day. What if I say it and I'm not selling? What if I'm not following the process? What advice would you have for people that feel like they're in that? You know, in that loop?

Megan Barnhard 31:57

Yeah. I'm just so much of finding your voice and of writing is about shedding, shedding, you know, ideas about what it should look like. And I always, you know, preface this by saying, I am not a social media expert, I don't I know zero about the algorithms, I have intuition about it. And there's kind of common sense. But stop. When you feel like I have to write, that's when you just stop, like, stop completely go radio silent, and decide, like what your intention is. And it's, it's the opposite of what we think we should do. Because we're told to be consistent, but the first like, the first thing, you can start to unravel, like, pull back the curtain and go like, Wait, who's really running the show? It's just just to ask yourself, What's the definition of consistent? And then when you realise like, oh, I don't? I don't know. Like, it just it's this thing that like the word consistent, or consistency? Is this, this monster that's chasing me? But if I turn around and look at it, what does that even mean? Is it every day? No, lots of people are doing lots of successful stuff without posting every day. Is it the same time every week? No, not even that. So I, I got some great advice from a mentor of mine. And she said, What if you stopped thinking of consistency as the amount of time you're showing up? Right? Like I post every Tuesday, or whatever it is? And you started asking, How can I create more consistent energy for myself? And then you open up this whole world where you go, Okay, wait a minute, if I could get a handle on my writing process, so that I could reliably get from that great inspired idea all the way through to a draft, I'm excited to publish, that would help me with consistency. If I worked on my internal energy, whatever that looks like, whether it's and I know, this is something you do with your clients, and you're really big on like, what are you doing that is re energising you or how are you setting boundaries so that you're reclaiming your energy and not feeling drained? And even I know, you do work with your clients on their human design and like, what is the pathway for them, that's going to be nurturing, as opposed to draining? So like, all of that feeds into consistency, what what's my writing process? What am I doing with my energy? And then how am I like, as you were just saying, continually staying in conversation with people and here's something that I think everybody forgets about and but you I'm sure don't, right? Like, what if part of your consistency once you define that and I was putting that in air quotes is you consistently get online and look at what other people are doing. And you cheer them on and you comment on their stuff. And you send them messages saying, you know, I just read that post you shared, and I found it so inspiring. Thank you. What about that consistency?

Paula Shepherd 35:19

That's exactly what I did to be honest with you. I just had a lot of conversations, and I did reach out to people, but I did it from a wit. For me, it came so naturally. Yeah, right. And for others, it really doesn't. But But you're right, coming up with that. What? What does this consistency look like? What does what feels good to me? Like, what makes us feel fun? What makes it feel exciting? What makes it like, how does it bring me joy versus feeling like a check that I checkbox on my to do list?

Megan Barnhard 35:50

Yeah. And the other piece of this is that we should never expect to feel the same way all the time. And this is especially true for women with our cycles. And, you know, expecting that I'm always going to have outgoing energy is a recipe for disappointment and beating yourself up. And I don't write every day, I do not write every day. And I feel great about that. And when I do feel called to write I'm usually creating a lot at once. Because I'm in that space, I'm in that energy. And I'm always I'm always preparing to write, I'm always collecting things, I have a wall full of post, it's where, you know, I'm I'm never sitting down going, I have to write something, what do I write, I'm collecting things I'm excited to write. And then when I'm in the energy for it, I'm like, Alright, I'm going to write things. It doesn't mean I don't plan and I don't schedule, you know, I, I do. And I know when I want to be putting things out into the world, and then work backwards from that and go, Okay, well, I'd like to be writing sometime in this range. And then I allow myself to write when it feels good. And this is so backwards, but so makes perfect sense. If people would give themselves permission to write less, they would end up writing more often. Because it's the forcing yourself, that makes writing feel heavy. And if you already have previous trauma around writing, if you already have challenges, like I had a client say to me one time, I can't be a writer, my sister's, the writer. And I absolutely understood what she meant. We all have that identity feeling of what I'm allowed to call myself and not allowed to call myself for whatever reason. So if we would first just turn around and stare at that monster of consistency and be like, what is that? What do I even mean when I say consistent, and start to unpack it. And then if we would look into what's the process that works for us, what makes it feel light, what makes it feel in flow, and I don't have to do this all the time, we would actually write way more, just from a place of joy. And then when you bring in, here's the other beautiful thing about what you do, Paula, when you bring in connecting with people, you are coming up with so many inspiring ideas all the damn time. Because you're like, oh, gosh, we just had that great conversation. And so so said this, and it reminds me that even though I'm in this place of expertise, and I think everybody knows X, Y, and Z, they don't really, and that's something I can share. So the more you connect and talk with people, the more ideas naturally come up through you, because the compassionate helping person in you is like, I want to share that because I know it's going to help somebody get to their next step.

Paula Shepherd 38:48

I love that so much because it takes out the old paradigm of like, you have to have the pillars and you can only write about the pillars. And it's like no, you're you're a person you're writing about your experience, you're writing about her being perceptive about the environment around you about the conversations and the people and the things and the feelings. I mean, I I look in front of me and there's a ruler, and I think I could probably write a story about that ruler and how I've used that ruler and then tie it somehow into my business and very naturally and organically without a lot of thought and I do know that when I first started and a lot of people when they are really battling with themselves when it comes to writing do feel like they don't have anything to write about. So I appreciate your thoughts around consistency and writing process that feels really good and brings you joy and feels exciting and frickin fun. Truly. You actually

Megan Barnhard 39:44

have really what makes people magnetic. When there's somebody that you feel magnetically pulled to you that person is having fun. They are asking themselves, even if, like if fun is sometimes a challenging word because they may be writing about something deep and serious, but they're in their flow, that's a better word when you're magnetically attracted to somebody they are sharing from their flow.

Paula Shepherd 40:10

Okay, we could not end on a better note there. I think that's it. I'm just I'm sitting in that for a second, because that feels really good for Friday. Even though they're going to be listening to this on a Monday, we're recording on a Friday. So Megan, you have an amazing class and on demand class on your website. I love it. I've watched it taken it, I highly recommend that everyone go to Megan's website, I will link everything in the show notes for you so that you can follow her on social media if you hang out on Facebook or Instagram, or go to her website and just download that and start getting yourself to a place where you feel like writing is fun and joyful again, in a way that is authentic to you. So Megan, thank you so much for being here.

Megan Barnhard 40:57

Thank you so much,

Paula Shepherd 40:58

Paula. All right. Until next time, I'll see you then. Thank you for listening to this episode of confidence session. I know there are hundreds of 1000s of podcasts. And I'm so grateful that you chose to spend your time today with me. Head on over to be fearless with paula.com forward slash podcast to check out the show notes from today's episode and grab links to all the amazing goodies mentioned today. Also, if you love this episode, as much as I love making it, make sure you don't miss any future ones by hitting the subscribe button right now. See you next time.

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